I Want To Be T Rump’s Attorney

Why not?

It all boils down to qualifications.

First and foremost, I’m not a lawyer.  I have no boundaries when it comes to explaining what’s “legal” and what’s “not legal” as it relates to defending any and all of T Rump’s tweets and past and present bad acts.  Think about it.

Ignorance is power.

And it’s only a few baby steps that separate “power” from “absolute power,” based on my understanding of the legal limits of “power.”

When challenged by media interrogators about whether this or that will hold up in court, all I have to say, with unbridled confidence, is “it should.”

If an interrogator persists in casting aspersions on El Presidente, I can always default to three trusted “Go-to’s” or deflectors:  “Obama screwed up so bad…” or “Hillary, as we all know, should be locked up….” Or “Bill Clinton never apologized to Monica Lewinsky….”  The beauty of having the names of three notorious patsies to invoke is that T Rump’s fan base doesn’t care what I say about them…I can just make stuff up…just the mention of their names infuriates them and drives them closer to II Duce like an invisible life-force.

Let us not forget about the Constitution.  Being a non-attorney allows me to interpret the Constitution variously, as in, “Mein Herr, per the Constitution, has unrestricted and absolute power to do whatever he wants”… Or “The best legal minds all agree the Constitution allows Mr. Big to do all sorts of things”…

Bottom Line:  T Rump needs legal help and he needs it now (before Robert Mueller reveals the facts that define, beyond any doubt, “collusion”, “money laundering” and “treason”).

Screw the law.  It just gets in the way.

Consider this my resume.


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