[Note: Eight-year-old Virginia O’Hanlon wrote a letter to the editor of New York’s Sun, and the quick response was printed as an unsigned editorial Sept. 21, 1897. The work of veteran newsman Francis Pharcellus Church has since become history’s most reprinted newspaper editorial. I used Francis Church’s letter as my content guide].
A Christmas Message From A President in Exile.
Yes, Virginia, Trump is Still President
Your friends and neighbors are wrong.
They have been affected by the truth in an age where the truth doesn’t matter.
Those around you do not believe except what they know to be fact. They think that anything that is comprehensible and verifiable is, in fact, believable.
In our great world, man is just a varmint, enchained by his intellect and capable only of grasping the whole truth from what he gleans from earnest, intellectual inquiry.
Yes, Virginia, I am Still President! I was re-elected as certainly as alternative facts define the reality that lives in the little space between your ears. Alas, how meaningless would political campaigning be if we didn’t have rigged elections? What fun would there be? It would be as bleak and dismal as a world without any Virginia’s. That eternal light that illuminates the empty space behind your eyes would be extinguished. Forever!
To not believe in my landslide victory, you must believe in the crowd-size fairies who are blind to alternative facts; the voting-size fairies who mistakenly value verifiable results; and the fairy of all fairies, the Great Deluded One who believes that I colluded with the Russians.
I admit, nobody sees my victory being a consequence of our representative democracy, but that is no sign it didn’t happen. The most real things in life are those no man, no woman, no child, nothing resembling a human can see.
Did you ever see an inaugural crowd bigger than mine? Or the five million unregistered, illegal immigrants who voted against me? Or my health care plan, Trump Care, that is better and cheaper than Obama Care? Or my tax cut program for middle income Americans? Or my infrastructure program that is well on its way to rebuilding America? Or my Covid-19 response that saved millions of lives? Or my Nobel Prize for developing a vaccine to combat the Covid plague?
Just because you haven’t seen or heard about these incredible accomplishments doesn’t mean they didn’t happen.
A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten thousand years, my 2020 presidential victory will remain the most bigly accomplishment in American political history along with my much-deserved visage chiseled alongside Abraham Lincoln’s on Mt. Rushmore.
(aka John Miller, David Dennison)